Just yesterday, I was driving to the gym with my windows rolled down, and the music cranked (as it always is when I drive alone). I had my “All Me” playlist on, which includes the likes of Pink, Alicia Keys, Kesha, Lizzo and Cardi B. And yes, you’re exactly right. I was belting it out.
Sure, there was the odd red-light situation in which the car next door had a bit of a chuckle. But guys, what I’ve learned over the years, is that people are obsessed with themselves. They’re in their own heads. Deep in the trenches of their own worries and fears and reflections.
And all that time we spend, marinating in anxiety about what other people think about us? It’s a waste. of. time!
Which is exactly why I think “Baby on Board” signs are absolute bullshit. You really think other people are suddenly going to change the way they drive, just because you happen to have precious cargo? No way!
They’re late for work. Pushin’ the yellows. Dodging around your “Baby Shark” infested vehicle. Your adorable infant? The last thing on their minds.
The web we weave, the thoughts we think……they define who we are. And if we choose to linger in "the-world-is-against-me," "I’m-not-good-enough," "woe-is-me" kind of thinking? We’ll only ever believe those thoughts. And hold ourselves back.
Molly Bloom, the notorious ring leader of the world’s most exclusive high-stakes underground poker game, once said that she engages in meditation as a way to make herself “dangerous.” And dangerous in the best kind of way.
Because it is the person who can control their thoughts, and become a witness to the negative self-talk, paralyzing doubt, and harsh self-criticism…..that conquers the world!
None of us can prevent our gut reactions and emotional responses altogether, but if we can learn to manage the spiralling thoughts of negativity that stem from a place of lack, we will be unstoppable.
And this, guys, is the #1 reason why I workout. As much as it is a test of physical endurance and strength, it is a test of mental endurance and strength. And it is the perfect opportunity to hone my positive mindset.
Every single time I start to let those “I can’t do this” thoughts creep in, I counteract them with a badass “fuck that….yes I can.” I counteract them with action, and I prove myself wrong. I witness the doubt, and I carry on anyways.
Which is a mindset that, with practice, has trickled into my everyday life.
I am running my own fitness event (no one will come, I might fail). "Fuck that....yes I can."
I am getting my own apartment (I'll never be able to support myself). "Fuck that...yes I can."
I am becoming a spin instructor (I won't be good at it, I'll never land the audition). "Fuck that...yes I can."
I am publishing a book (people will hate it, no one will read it). "Fuck that....yes I can."
It’s about observing the fears, the anxieties, the worries, and concerns over what other people will think, and instead of letting them completely own me......mentally crumpling them up, like a piece of paper, and tossing them aside, when I know they aren’t serving me.
How do you sell yourself short? How do you let fear and anxiety rule the day? How do you doubt yourself?
Where can you flip the switch, crumple the paper, and tell yourself, "fuck that......yes I can!"?
Start practicing the power of deliberate positive thinking. Get yourself pumped up with Lizzo's "Good as Hell." And aim to become the most dangerous person in the room: a mother-fucking mindset ninja.